What's Ahead?

All this time, I'd been thinking that there is a definite reason that I'm being "terminated" from my job. I still believe that. But it just dawned on me that there may be something so bad in our future that there's no way I could work and deal with whatever this horrible thing is. Maybe IVF is going to be like the HSG and turn out even worse than I had imagined. Maybe IVF won't work and I have an even longer, more depressing road to travel. Mom and Dad are going on another big motorcycle trip and had the 'what if' talk, which freaked me out. This talk has come for years each time they go on a big trip... but I'm just a bit on edge anticipating the reason God has put me out of work at this point in time.

OK. I'm so sorry for that. Nathan threatened not to come home while I was expressing my thoughts on this over the phone. Sorry to be such a downer... but it just hit me on my way home from work. I'm really kind of unsure of what to do at this point. Do I look for a job intensely or wait until after we get through IVF stuff. Do I look into going back to school while it won't cost me anything. Or do I sit and wait. I'm just really trying to be patient and trusting in God, but its difficult when my crazy, human, emotional mind starts running wild.

On a much more positive note... Yay for the weekend!!!